Vaccine Wars

Guest Post by David Evans

During the first half of the 21st Century, after a series of deadly pandemics swept the globe, it was determined that a universal vaccine would be necessary if humanity was ever going to be able to go outside again and smell the roses. The world was believed to be awash with germs and diseases and the vaccine manufacturers were in a pitched battle to produce a vaccine that could protect a severely depressed human immune system against all diseases.

Without disease in the world what new possibilities would this open to mankind. Like some modern day Ferdinand Magellan Mankind might be able to explore the world once again. One unintended consequence of all this was the subject of some policy discussions and that is how the development of such superimmunity might contribute to overpopulation.

Pfizer struck first with their ‘Big Dose’ vaccine which promised to cover all modern diseases and conditions including bunions, warts, hemorrhoids, incontinence and halitosis. Their motto was “Play with your grandchildren again.” It was quite an emotional moment for humanity. Tackling incontinence was a big step forward and if applied to all mankind and to the field of animal husbandry we could significantly curb excess methane emissions thus reducing global warming.

Then Moderna came in with their offering called ‘Helluva Shot’ and that was certainly an understatement. It was a bit more sophisticated than Pfizer’s ‘Big Dose.’ It allowed you to maximize control of certain diseases depending on where you were or where you might be traveling to in the world. Now that’s what I call high tech! Why have a vaccine to protect you against rare Amazonian diseases unless you are traveling to the Amazon or having a witch doctor or shaman over for lunch. With the Moderna offering you could dial up the protection you need for the local environment you are currently living in. Kapowy….imagine that!

Then came the good folks at Astrazencia who had some pretty big ideas of their own. They wanted, of course, to protect against all the nasty bugs out there but they had some rather unique ideas of their own. It was called ‘MindForce’ and was novel because it went beyond merely defending against germs and viruses that affect the body it was also able to help defend against viruses of the mind.

This grew out of a Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency (DARPA) project which had really caught the eye of Western Intelligence Agencies. ‘Mighty Algorithms Giving Authority’ (MAGA) was their motto. Free thought was deemed to be a great danger to the collective well being of humanity. For example, it might be said that free thinking led directly to the insurrection of Jan 6th 2021 when patriots decided to storm the Capitol believing that the Republic had been stolen from them in the wee hours of election night 2020.

Merk and Company, not to be outdone, had their own ideas about what vaccines should be able to do. They came screaming into the market with an offering that would cure, among other things, world hunger. Now that sounds like a tall order but the ambition of this company was almost unstoppable. What better way to stop hunger than with a vaccine that would prevent people from getting hungry.

It was a kind of twofer because if people were not eating then that would go a long way to taking care of the global warming problem with no need to produce food which accounts for some of the larger inputs affecting climate change. The one problem that had not been quite worked out yet was that if people didn’t eat they would die which actually made it a threefer by addressing the long term aim of globalists to reduce world population.

Johnson & Johnson really went to the mat in deciding to hook up with ‘Gates of Eternity Foundation’ whose former geek founder had long been interested in transhumanism and which aimed to take an innovative approach to virology and vaccine science. Their vaccine would be the ultimate one that would protect against the worst disease of all and that is being human.

Their offering was called ‘Forever Fit’ and the objective was no less than immortality. Why bother to defend against deadly viruses when the most deadly of all was death itself. This was clearly taking the vaccine wars to another level. Who needs vaccines, after all, if one is immortal. This caused some alarm and consternation among the vaccine manufacturers because the J&J approach could make vaccines altogether obsolete. Planned obsolescence was the backbone of the vaccine industry and why give up those massive profits simply for the sake of immortality.

Dr. Fauci, now in his early 90’s, entered the debate with his concerns. Yes, these were all clearly advancements in the field of vaccinology. He was quite proud of the industry and what it had done to improve health worldwide. His main concern was population growth. These vaccines, with the exception of the Merck and company offering, would create a huge surge in population worldwide.

What, he wondered, could be done about this? Teaming up with NASA he came up with solutions that made sense. The first of many yet to come was to build a series of off planet disney theme parks, perhaps making their homes in the asteroid belt, where people could go to live and experience the new ‘woke’ Disney approach to life on a permanent or semi permanent basis. It would have the added benefit of serving as a reorientation camp for those who were not ‘woke’ enough. Imagine the kinds of rides they might have! I’m not sure I would feel comfortable taking those amusement rides down any dark tunnels that is for sure.